Even as I say this, I am sipping my coffee and sitting in my still, empty house, listening to the sound of my seven-week old daughter’s breath as she lies against my chest, nestled in her carrier. Looking outside my window, I can see the red rhododendron bush (the one I thought I had killed with radical pruning) blooming and blowing in the wind. My life these days is not marked by production, completed to-do lists, or far-off spontaneous adventures. I am certainly not about to set out on a tour with my favourite band (or any band, for that matter), nor will I be leaving my small town for a little while.
But even as I know I’m homeward bound for the next bit, it is still all happening. This beautiful life around me is unfolding in the very small moments of the day, whispering a sweet stillness into my bones. Don’t get me wrong, I still get a high from a completed to-do list and I get giddy thinking about far-off adventures, I am just acknowledging that will all take place in a different season. I want to be here now with my husband and daughter, soaking up every bit of time with them, creating memories, and building our home.
I have missed writing something fierce, but took a break, mostly because there were all sorts of rules I had to all of a sudden follow I felt like if I wasn’t on my way to monetizing my blog, then I wasn’t being productive. If I wasn’t being consistent with my writing and posting 3-7 times a week, then it wasn’t even worth it. If I wasn’t constantly putting myself out there and networking, then I wasn’t a proper blogger and nothing I said would be taken seriously. All of the rules that entered the blogging world didn’t sit well with me, so I backed out. It was my kick-back reaction to what I felt was someone trying to micromanage my creative outlet, and that’s something I don’t handle well.
Also, at this stage in life (new mom, tight budget, etc) I probably can’t create the newest and most exciting recipes constantly. And I have so much more to talk about than just recipes! I want to write about our past adventures and plan for future ones. I want to share how we have gutted and renovated our house (and still have projects in the works!). I want to gush on my new baby girl and share with you how she has turned our lives upside down in the best possible way! So this is that new space. This is a glimpse into my heart and life, where I can type in tears about what God is teaching me, and where I can simply be with you guys. Thanks. xx